30 Rock | S3E7 | January 8, 2009

Series: 30 Rock
Season: 3
Episode: [7] Senor Macho Solo
Original Air Date: 01/08/09 (TV); 01/09/09 (Online)


Liz: Hey Max, is this your little sister? Oh, what a cute little girl…or boy, if you grow up and feel that that’s what’s inside you.



Jack: Tracy, your friends and I are worried about you. We think your spending has gone out of control.
Tracy: … Give me an example.



Liz: I like your tie.
Stewart: And I like aggressive women with a nerdy vibe. How bout we grab some coffee and explore this?



Angie: I’ll sign your stupid contract…never gonna leave this man anyway.
Tracy: You’re not?!
Angie: Baby, I’m gonna be with you til the very end. I’m going to watch you die, Tracy Jordan.



Kenneth: So Stewart, what is it like living under a bridge?



Jack: How did you and Lemon meet?
Stewart: Liz here just saw me on the street and went for it.
Jack: Lemon did that?
Liz: Yeah…you know me. Spend my lunch hour walking up and down 6th avenue, looking for a hot meal.
Jack: Okay! Classic Lemon man-eater.
Liz: …Cat sound…heh.



“Here’s Maroney on a windy day.”



Liz: I have a thing about intimacy. I’m the weird one, I’m weirder than you!
Stewart: …How am I weird?
Liz: You’re not! That came out wrong!

30 Rock | S3E6 | December 11, 2008

Series: 30 Rock
Season: 3
Episode: [6] Christmas Special
Original Air Date: 12/11/08 (TV); 12/12/08 (Online)


Kenneth: I love helping people less fortunate than me.
Toofer: Where do you find them?



Liz: Listen to this- 'Dear Santa, my name is Chanel Jenkins. I would like some new shoes so I can walk to school. My dream is to be a doctor someday-'
Tracy: [crying] That kid's never going to be a doctor.



Liz: Where are you? I hear sunshine.



Jack: I hit her. I hit her with my car... She’s fine. She’s better than fine. They’re giving her a titanium hip. Like the Terminator. It’s only going to make her more powerful.



Liz: Hey Toofer! Can I buy a kid "Fubu?" Is that a swear word?



Liz: I know, but I have a new family, the Glovers! And I am going to get them all these raping Santas. ... Well I kind of assumed they’d rap, which is kind of racist on my part. But still, best Christmas ever! You’re welcome Glovers!



Tracy: What’s the past tense for "scam?" Is it "scrumped?" Liz Lemon, I think you just got scrumped!



Kenneth: I don’t believe people would do that, Ms. Lemon. This is a religious holiday. When has religion caused any trouble?
Liz: Kenneth, you’re naive.
Kenneth: And you’re acting like a real C-word right now. That’s right - a cranky sue!



Tracy: Liz Lemon, I know you’re going to be all alone on Christmas Day. So if you like, you can spend it with the Jordans.
Liz: I’d love too Tracy.
Tracy: Good, we’ll be over at 2. My kids have a peanut allergy, but my dogs only eat steak.



Jack and Colleen: [singing] Merry Christmas...to yooooooou.

Tina Fey Voted AP Entertainer of the Year

Tina Fey voted AP Entertainer of the Year